The Difference Between Love and Like: Loving Beyond Preferences

Love and like may seem similar, but they’re distinct in God’s perspective, especially when it comes to how we treat others. While we often “like” people based on shared interests, personalities, or behaviors, “love” in God’s sense goes beyond preferences and circumstances. Love reaches out regardless of personal likes or dislikes. In the words of the Apostle Paul, *“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us”* (Romans 5:8). This love isn’t about preference but about commitment, sacrifice, and choosing to see others through Christ’s eyes.

1. Love Is Commanded, Like Is Optional

Scripture is clear that love is not a suggestion; it is a command. Jesus Himself said, *“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another”* (John 13:34). Jesus didn’t say, “like one another,” but “love one another,” regardless of our feelings or differences. This love is not based on how we feel about someone or what we have in common; it’s rooted in God’s love for us.

While liking someone might be easy, loving them as God commands can be challenging. The beauty of this command is that it is not based on conditions but on obedience to Christ. In 1 John 4:7-8, we are reminded, *“Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. He who does not love does not know God, for God is love.”* Our ability to love others, even those we may not like, is evidence of our relationship with God.

2. Love Is Selfless; Like Is Conditional

One of the main differences between love and like is that love is selfless, while like is often conditional. We tend to like people based on what they do or how they make us feel. But true, godly love is not based on conditions or what we gain in return. As 1 Corinthians 13:5 says, *“[Love] does not seek its own.”* 

God’s love for us demonstrates this beautifully. He didn’t love us because we were lovable; He loved us despite our sin. He loved us enough to send His Son to die for us, even though we had nothing to offer Him in return (John 3:16). This sacrificial love is what God calls us to show others. When we love as God does, we go beyond likes and dislikes, choosing to care for and serve others regardless of what they can give back to us.

3. Love Covers a Multitude of Sins

Love also covers imperfections. In 1 Peter 4:8, we’re told, *“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”* Our love for others doesn’t mean ignoring wrongdoing, but it means choosing to see past faults and choosing forgiveness. Just as God separates the sinner from their sin, we are called to love others beyond their mistakes.

Even if we don’t “like” someone’s actions, we can still choose to love them. Just as God forgave us and continues to forgive us, we are called to forgive and extend grace to others. When we love with the love of Christ, we are able to see people through His eyes, not through their faults.

4. Love Is Unifying; Like Can Be Divisive

Liking someone is often rooted in common interests, shared backgrounds, or similar personalities. However, when we only connect with those we like, it can create division, as it excludes those who are different from us. Love, on the other hand, is unifying. Colossians 3:14 says, *“And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”* 

Love binds us together because it’s based on something greater than personal preferences. Jesus loved people from all walks of life and spent time with everyone from tax collectors to fishermen. He saw beyond the surface and loved unconditionally, which is the same love we’re called to extend.

5. Love Is Rooted in God, Like Is Rooted in Self

Our ability to truly love comes from God. The Bible says, *“We love because He first loved us”* (1 John 4:19). Unlike liking, which often comes naturally, loving others as God commands requires His presence within us. Love is a reflection of God’s character, and it’s only through Him that we can genuinely love others, even those we may not naturally like.

In Galatians 5:22, love is listed as a fruit of the Spirit. This means it is something that the Holy Spirit develops within us as we grow closer to God. Our love for others, then, is not based on our own ability or preference but on God’s transforming work within us.

6. Living Out Christ’s Love: Moving Beyond Like to True Love

When we walk in Christ’s love, we see others through the lens of grace, rather than judgment or preference. This love means putting others first, forgiving freely, and striving for unity. Jesus said, *“By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another”* (John 13:35). This love is what sets us apart as followers of Christ and is what God uses to draw others to Himself.

Romans 12:9 instructs us to *“Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil; cling to what is good.”* This verse challenges us to love genuinely, not just because it’s commanded but because it reflects God’s love within us.

Conclusion: Choosing Love Beyond Likes

In a world that often encourages us to separate based on personal preferences, God calls us to a higher standard. We are called to love others deeply, just as He loves us. Regardless of likes or dislikes, we must remember that Christ loved us while we were still sinners and that He commands us to extend this same love to others.